Assalamu'alaikum 20

Just turned 20 (June 28th)..

No-more teen, weh?

What's that mean?

It means saya harus semakin banyak ibadahnya,

karena telah berkurang jatah umur di dunia fana ini,

MasyaAllah, bener-bener ga kerasa 20 tahun itu. Malu iya sih, kalo ditanya 'sudah ngelakuin apa selama 20 thn ini', wah gondok sekali saya. Engga tau udah berapa banyak dosa saya 20 tahun ini. Yang jelas lagi berjuang-berjuang nya buat hijrah, supaya Allah ampuni dosa-dosa lalu dan beri kecerahan  untuk di masa datang (seengganya ga sesuram dulu, lah).

20 tahun ya.. belum ada ngelakuin sesuatu buat orang tua. Tapi insyaAllah, ibu bapak seneng ngeliat anaknya udah ga kaya dulu lagi. Iyakan Bu, Pak? Hehe. Berusaha buat jadi anak/wanita muslimah yang sholehah (aamiin). Ibu bapak doain mbak ya supaya bisa konsisten kalo bisa makin .. lagi hehehe.

Berjuang kesana itu kaya ngedaki gunung. Memang banyak hambatan termasuk duri-duri, rumput gatel, ranting pohon bahkan pohon tumbang. But finally, you will find apa yang kamu cari, rasanya tuh puaaaaassss banget. Godaan banyak, jelas banyak. Iman bahkan bisa naik turun setiap hari. Hari ini seperti ini besok belum tentu seperti ini, eh lusa sudah kaya gitu. Kadang ngena kalo baca tulisan "Apa kabar iman-mu hari ini?", rasanya pengen jejeritan pas ngerasa lagi turun. Ini bisa dibilang hijrah? Ya, InsyaAllah.. Hijrah itu asyik ternyata, quality time sama Tuhan lebih berasa, apalagi kalo hati lagi ringsek, ancur, remuk, rindu *ets atau apalah mau ngadu sambil nangis sambil apa juga ga ada yang ngetawain ga sama kaya kalo curhat ama temen. Beh. Diketawain iya, bocor juga iya. Hahahahaha. *maapin*

Walaupun-lah belum sempurna iman ini, belum baik perangai ini,

tapi insyaAllah insyaAllah, Allah beri kekuatan untuk selalu konsisten bahkan nambah,

bisa jaga lisan dan hati juga.. karena fase ini lumayan sulit. Nghe.

Well, terima kasih untuk teman-teman yang sudah ngucapin dan ngirimin doa-doa serta kue beserta kadonya. InsyaAllah, Allah balaskan dengan sesuatu yang bermanfaat:) Semoga teman hijrah saya juga nambah ya, karena gak cuma pengen lihat kalian di sini aja, tapi insyaAllah di akhirat juga. Uhibbukum fillah.. InsyaAllah:)

Much love, Amalia.

Sajakku Hari Ini

Dosakah aku;

Masih disini diam terpaku,

Bayangkan wajah yang jarang terlihat;

Lamunkan paras yg tak pernah teringat.

Salahkan diri;

Masih betah berdiri sendiri,

Mengingat suara yang jarang terdengar;

Dengungkan lafaz yang tak pernah tersiar.

Di sini hanya bisa memeluk bayangan;

Sebab jasadmu masih di dalam angan,

Di sini hanya bisa menatap semu;

Sebab kita belumlah bertemu.

Andai esok kau kan hadir;

Sembunyilah dahulu dibalik tabir,

Hingga tiba di suatu senja;

Indah namamu akan ku eja.

Sebab pabila saat ini kau kusentuh;

Sama halnya ku tikam di sekujur tubuh,

Dengan besi berpanaskan bara;

Yang sakitnya sungguh tiada tara.

Sebab pabila saat ini kau kupandang;

Sama saja kubiarkan semua menghilang,

Setiap ayat yang tlah teringat;

Setiap hafalan yang tlah terpahat.

Maka biarlah kupinta kau dalam diam;

Lafazkan namamu disetiap kelam,

Dalam hening sujud yang mendalam;

Di syahdunya sejuk udara sang malam.

Hingga kelak di jingga nanti;

Kan kurangkai serpihan hati,

Kala senja tlah keluar dari sangkar;

Izinkan kubuka tabir dengan sebuah ikrar.

Diamku adalah cara merawat;

Agar terhindar dari segala maksiat,

Diamku adalah cara merindu;

Agar dosa-dosa tak segera beradu.

Diamku adalah cara menjaga;

Sebab baginya terjanjikan surga,

Diamku adalah cara mencinta;

Sebab darinya ada Ridha Sang Pencipta.

Dikutip dari: tausiyahku.com

Karangan, A Day Trip

After hectic months, hundreds papers, tens journal and just a little free time------we harness that day to outing and feelin the air. Heard that Tikalong waterfall, in Karangan, Landak Regency, West Kalimantan (±150km from Pontianak) had some good panorama, so we just bang it up.

Above 3 hours we arrived at the-place-that-I-thought-it-will-so-so-because-I-was-went-to-a-waterfall-in-Rasau-and-it-was-so-so-so-I-dont-bring-any-clothes and gue nyesek berat. That waterfall amazed me. By hearing the sound of water.. I can calm, believe me hehehehe. No swim swim imut because didn't bring anyclothes hiks. Here's some picture of last trip (Fri, 29 May 2015).

 

That 'A Day Trip' enough for refreshing my brain, washing eyes and ect haha. Was so fun as usual but much exhausted too. I was being motorcycle-driver for 3-4 hours mhek. But thats okay. Work paid off :p I should more grateful for having the coolest classmates ever (hehehe). By them, I've been taught customs, culture, typical food, the cool places I've never been in some outlying district and ect. Much appreciate to you guys! *prok prok prok*

See ya for the next trip. Emah! [another pics will be adding soon]

TOO BIG TO TELL

Alhamdulillah.. Alhamdulillah..

I just can't tell how much Allah loves His ummah

When you tryin to walk to catch His love,

He just run into you and give you hidayah

Allahu akbar!

Where was I for this 19 years? O Allah.. how much my sins?

Do I tryin to be near to You, Allah? Do I always grateful?

Do I always do good to my parents? Do I watch my mouth?

Do I keep praying on time? Do I keep reading Quran?

Do I give infaq with full of heart? Do I use syar'i hijab?

No, I wasn't. Wrong side, that was I. But Allah still lovin me... :"

His love is too big to tell

His karunia is too much to write

His hidayah just too beautiful

I just felt His love when I'm going 20...

Its terrible.

I can feel it when I was tryn to get closer with Him

I was learning from every moment I get through

By loving someone, I know how to keep this feelin

I know how to manage this feelin, I know I must love him because of Him

and I know I should leave him because of Him

No one know beside Allah.

I just pray and tawakkal to Him

Because we plan, but Allah decide.

Our duty for right now is reform our self,

Be a good muslimah as Qur'an and Sunnah taught us

Our pairs (azwaja) will come easily, and the are the reflection of our self:)

Because I want a good Imam to be a leader of my little family hehe

Who can bring me and my future child into jannah..

Such as Surah An-Nuur: 26.

"Evil words are for evil men, and evil men are [subjected] to evil words. And good words are for good men, and good men are [an object] of good words. Those [good people] are declared innocent of what the slanderers say. For them is forgiveness and noble provision."

MashaAllah..

Thank you Allah for the chance you gave me.

InshaAllah, istiqomah.. InshaAllah..

I know, You're the Best Planner.